Anniversaries are usually happy. Each año que pasa es símbolo de algo, como cuando un hijo cumple su primer año de vida o hace un año se está en una relación con otra persona. Hoy voy a escribir algo muy personal. Este tema me está rondando la cabeza y el corazón desde hace justamente un año.
Entre otros calificativos, podría decirse que soy (o era) bailarina de tango. Comencé hace cuatro años y medio, cuando no tenía todavía dieciséis años. Era muy inocente, y un aparato: la primera clase fui con unos jeans negros, una pollera encima, una remera gigante de color rojo, y zapatillas negras con cordones fucsias. El punto es que desde ese día comencé taking classes on some Saturdays a month, and then all my Saturdays became tango. Worse was when I met the milongas. Saturday became class and milonga, and when I finished high school I abused the money that was working and I was about five or six times a week to dance.
Once you get into the tango, go hard, always argue that, although for several months I began to understand people who do the world out danceable, or displayed in part. partially because when I say most days would, of course he thought that he was once or twice a week would sporadically.
Tango saw me grow up, I accompanied the first time I broke my young heart, and the second too. That is, although many people do not know think that tango is for old or always sad and melancholy, not only are the letters that matters in the tango, is all. The people, the environment, the ego, touch, rhythm, embrace the night, the shoes, the looks, the pitch, the whole ritual that means diving into the world of tango and be devoted. I think this holds more than the concept of "old" and "sad."
Yes, tango is sad, but never gave me more sorrows of those he already had. A friend once told me that he had entered the world of 2 x 4 in a very bad time in their lives, and to hear the letters, he felt that those singers told him "I also spent", and comforted . He dances great and is the person with whom I had danced more connection in my good moments. It's something bizarre and inexplicable, because a lot of people can enjoy dancing immensely, but I think I found that connection ... I do not know, not to predict what will
do the other, but feel what will act as if it were to execute a movement, not just to answer (as I have I do that dance in the role of women). In July last year I went to Córdoba. Pain in my legs, returning to Buenos Aires I was diagnosed with tendinitis. But it was a major pain, it was as if I had the legs hard. I thought it was cold, or not to stretch. I enjoyed the milongas of Cordoba, and went to dance all night.
I recommended to take ibuprofen and I put ice. I did, but I do not agree to another orthopedist. Kinesiology sessions gave me, I did, I became more and more and more and more sessions of kinesiology. Months passed, and an orthopedist said he wanted to inject steroids in the bursa (a "bag" that cushions the contact between the joints and tendons and muscles), so I went out shooting. Another told me it was a combination of many "itis" (bursitis, tendinitis, trochanters), and finally in December I found an attending orthopedic surgeon told me many classical dancers. In February, I attended, examined me and told me that he was not a leg injury, but came from the hip. I did a scan of the hip arthroMR in which they had to inject the dye groin. Beautiful experience. In April I finally got my accurate diagnosis: rupture of the labrum both sides of the hip.
The labrum is a membrane that surrounds the head of the femur, and rupture (even a little, as in my case) causes pain in the hip area, legs, shorter movements, and I repeat: it causes pain . Let practice: what I feel is an incredible heaviness in the legs, as if they were nailed to the floor (quite contrary to what I have to do when I dance, and do it before my leg pain), I feel tiredness because I work hard when I walk, sometimes it hurts less, more. It hurts if I sleep on your side, I have to sleep with a pillow between your legs or down if I sleep on your back, it hurts all the leg above the knees, the twins kill me.
How? Because I have between 10 and 15 kilos more than I download, and dancing on tiptoe with four-inch heels, I overloaded my weak legs.
How to cure? The reality is that with surgery. But since I'm young, if underweight, take the pills for the regeneration of cartilage, and I kinesiology, perhaps in a LONG (capitalized and undefined) time to heal alone.
I know it is death. I broke a leg. But luck (and unwittingly myself) I took something that was very important for me. Try to recover again, but the road is hard. And I speak not only by diet, pain and discomfort. I speak of tears.
Losing even temporarily to tango, it was as if I broke your heart for the third time.
Almost everyone has experienced the sensation of hearing a song that takes us somewhere else to previous years, feeling almost the same body we had at that time, the same story, the same aroma, the same environment. That happens to me with the tango, and really every time it happens, when there are tangos that remind me my most glorious nights in which she danced like crazy, he knew people and was happy, excited, it is inevitable that Sadness fills me and give me an overwhelming desire to mourn. It happens often. I have to go to the bathroom to mourn two minutes there and discharges, and at least does not ruin the night to anyone besides myself. Sometimes something happens and I get a little excited, the night picks up, but most I'm going with a sense of emptiness and helplessness, of feeling that I'll have to wait long to return to what it was before in a milonga .
The environment also can me: competition, ego, attention. Almost all of the tango universe is based on appearances, and while I have met people with whom I have close friends, are isolated cases. I meet people and I'm happy, but others saw some people is a stitch in his stomach. Makes me want to vomit.
With this I mean that is very hard for me not to dance, can not give what we did before, give less than half of what I could for my tastes bad dancing, dancing with people who once danced with me and said it was a pen, and now I know that I am the heaviest that can be. Not that I'm a beginner and do not know what I miss. I know what I'm missing, and although everyone tells me "you'll get better now," I do not care. This time, "though I'm young, and it will improve, and have time", no one returns and I wanted because I was happy to spend time in the tango. And I'm sad, I get nervous, and that's how I can not enjoy it. I hope I can do it again.
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